image from gourmet.com

There really is no good reason to make this pie, but when I saw it on Gourmet’s website a few weeks ago I really wanted to find a reason. Now that Gourmet is gone it seems some ridiculous pie making might be in order. Because along with the magazine and the website (though I assume epicurious.com will continue) all the web only recipes will disappear–mr. fatty fatty bacon pie being one of them.  My favorite part of this recipe–after the fact that practically every other ingredient is fat–is the little parenthetical after 1 cup peanut butter (not natural). It was obviously very late in the evening when someone decided to throw together a jar of Jif, some chocolate wafers and bacon dipped in sugar. Eating this pie seems like a good way to say goodbye and screw you! how the hell did you %!*&  everything up enough to make this great magazine get axed.

peach and creme fraiche pie to be exact. It was made and already eaten–pie is just so good for breakfast. Though this pie wasn’t quite as good as I thought it would be. It was pretty damn tasty, don’t get me wrong, but the streusel didn’t really do it for me. There should have been more crunch to it. Next time I’ll add some chopped almonds or something else to give it more dimension. Because as it stands this pie is all creamy and softy peachy goodness, which sure as hell ain’t bad.

I made a rhubarb custard pie yesterday after picking up some lovely rhubarb at the farmer’s market. My mother made this pie every spring and would always say that it proved the existence of god. And really it is damn good. The recipe is from Betty Crocker and it’s quite simple, but the lattice top makes it look extra impressive.  I took some pictures while I was putting the pie together and though I’d share a little lattice top tutorial so all your pies can look fancy fancy too.

Make enough pie crust for a 2 crust pie (there is a good recipe here). Roll half out and line your pie pan, put you filling in and pop it in the fridge while you roll out the other half of the dough. Roll the second half out just like the first: about an 1/8″ thick and slightly bigger than your pie pan. Cut the whole thing into one inch strips. Now place two of the longest strips in the middle perpendicular to each other. Fold the strip that is underneath back over the strip on top and add another parallel to the one on top about a half an inch away. Continue weaving the strips by folding every other strip up and putting a new strip in. If your strips are broken or you don’t have enough long ones, just hide the broken bit under another strip and no one will ever know. When you’ve covered the whole top, seal the pie by pinching the top and bottom crusts together (two fingers on the outside and one on the inside, just like the picture) around the whole pie. With a sharp knife cut all the excess dough off and stand back and admire your work. Before putting in the oven be sure to brush the top with cream (or egg wash) and sprinkle with sugar. This will make the lattice top look even better.

Rhubarb Custard Pie
from Betty Crocker

3 eggs
3 Tbsp. milk
2 cups sugar
1/4 cup flour
3/4 tsp nutmeg
4 cups cut-up rhubarb
1 Tbsp butter

Beat the eggs and milk in a large bowl. Mix the sugar, flour and nutmeg together and add to the eggs. Mix well. Add the rhubarb and stir. Pour into your prepared crust. Dot with the butter. Cover with lattice top. Bake for 50-60 minutes at 400 degrees (Fahrenheit) until nicely browned. Serve slightly warm (with vanilla ice cream!) or cold for breakfast the next day.

little jack horner sat in a corner,

eating his christmas pie:

he put in his thumb, and pulled out a plum

and said, “what a good boy am I!”

Here he is pulling out the plum! I was really nervous about tackling the pie and the plum, but surprisingly I didn’t have problems with either (problems with my sewing machine that resulted in very loud swearing, yes). The pie plate has pintucks all around and is stuffed with foam and cotton batting. The pie is a natural linen lined with a purple and red print that I have ridiculous amounts of. I don’t normal like purple, but I thought that it almost looked like the inside of a plum pie: all red and purple and oozy. The pie is just gathered and hand sewn to the plate. I have no idea where this idea came from, but I think it actually looks like the crimped edge of a pie. And as I used to be a baker, I am especially proud of it. The pie also has a little pocket on top to hold the plum. I sewed the pocket in and then made a little bias tape and finished it with that. It looks okay, but I think there are neater ways of doing something like this (putting an invisible pocket not on a seam) that I don’t know of yet. I made the plum from this beautiful deep purple (really, I never liked purple before this) cotton that feels very fine and soft. A half yard of it cost me a whole quarter at my local thrift. It has a little elastic at the bottom to fit over Jack’s thumb and to make it more plum shaped. The plum is stuffed a little and lined with the purple and red print as well. Except for the pie, I stuffed everything with the new eco- friendly fiberfil which is made from corn. It worked pretty well, though I’m not the world’s best stuffer so I don’t trust me. The package doesn’t have any washing directions on it, so I have no idea if you can wash it or not, but you must be able to right?

All in all, I’m really happy with how everything turned out. When I started to make toys from nursery rhyme characters I had this idea that they should be slightly interactive–not really the right word, but you know what I mean. So, Jack, the pie, and the plum are all separate and you can act out the rhyme (if you are so inclined) or just put them in different poses on display. See the whole rhyme in pictures on my flickr page. As I mentioned before, this is my entry for the Softies Central Holiday awards (holiday smorgasbord category). So go look at all the fabulous entries right now!